1. Holes can be put in floors and walls can come down much more easily than you thought.
2. This is both alarming and encouraging.
3. You can live with things that look horrideous for a long time and not even notice them anymore.
4. When your contractor asks you how to turn on the light in the basement and you wade in the dark through a maze of benches, boxes, Christmas lights, and laundry to get to the far back corner where you twist a bare bulb that's hanging gingerly out of the ceiling until it turns on and he looks at you like you are completely out of your mind, it occurs to you that perhaps you should see about asking someone to install a light switch. That you've lived here for ten years and this is the first time that it's occurred to you that you could see about asking someone to install a light switch is, literally, a lightbulb moment.
5. Make mental note to find therapist with which to discuss.
6. Which will increase the budget.
7. When it comes to picking out flooring, it's shocking how much unattractive fake-tile flooring in earthtones there is in the world.
8. You don't like earthtones. Or dark tones.
9. The salespeople, everywhere you go, tell you that everyone likes earthtones and dark tones. Except for you.
10. You are freakish. You like gray. There was one fake carrara marble one, but it was discontinued and unavailable. Because "nobody" liked it.
11. You have a lot of work to do on ornament kits, but you can't seem to stop reading Scandinavian blogs about gray walls, wainscoting, whitewashed floors, painted floors, gray floors, and navy gingham.
12. Enjoy myself during the day to decorate the room of the bathing.
13. You have started speaking English as translated out of Norwegian by Google translator.
14. Thus even further complicating all communication with Ron, the contractor.
15. You have decided to stick with only colors from the Bejamin Moore Historic Collection, since the last two colors you painted anything (Wythe Blue and Buxton Blue) were perfect.
16. Which has never in the history of your life happened before.
17. There are some things you are willing to splurge on (light fixtures) and some things you won't pay a penny more than fifty cents to five dollars for (tiles and towels).
18. The reason that bathrooms look so pretty in books in magazines is because they don't have the self-propogating piles of hairbrushes, hair dryers, shampoo bottles, bathmats, mouthwash, plungers, L.L. Bean catalogs, electronic football games, toilet paper rolls, ponytail holders, and pumice stones that seem to clutter up yours. Because you have pedestal sinks. (And the bathroom is literally only four feet wide.)
19. You decide to only allow Kiehl's products into your new bathrooms, like your friend Linda. You will ban Darling Husband's ginormous bottle of generic bright orange mouthwash that doesn't fit in any cabinet and frisk all incoming grocery bags at the door.
20. And now the budget really is completely blown.